


Everybody Loves Hal Jordan

by Anonymous



Category: Green Lantern (Comics)
Genre: M/M, guy confesses he has a big ass crush but not to hal, mentions of other hal ships because why not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-26 09:54:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19003408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Guy Gardner cannot stop waxing poetic about Hal Jordan’s magnificent ass, John Stewart might be astral projecting to get away from this conversation, Kyle Rayner is trying to rub the image out of his mind (but can’t), and Kilowog is just so done.





	1. Chapter 1

Kilowog has just about enough of Guy Gardner’s ogling. He’d noticed it happening a lot now. Everytime the Earth Lanterns were called to Oa for a meeting, Guy would stand just _right_ behind Hal and audaciously check out his ass with the stupidest devil-may-care grin on his face like he _wanted_ everyone to see what he was doing. This fact, unfortunately, was indeed known to everyone except for the victim himself. Tired of it all, he called the offending human to one of the training rooms and basically shoved him in it so he could scream at the red-head.

“Guy, would you stop doing that?!”

“What? Admiring a hot piece of ass?”

John and Kyle halted their training and were probably regretting why they chose this specific room. They knew exactly who was the topic of this discussion.

“Just lemme appreciate something beautiful, okay?! I don’t see this guy for weeks at a time, I think I’m entitled to a little once-over.”

Kilowog lowers his head into his oversized hands and immediately regrets ever bringing this up. John and Kyle looked more awkward than shocked, this wasn’t the first time they’ve had a conversation like this about Hal.

“I mean would you look at that his ass?! Who wouldn’t fall for that?” 

“He really does have a nice butt,” Kyle chimed in with a far off look as if he was imagining it right then and there.

John simply pinched the bridge of his nose like this was the umpteenth time he had to deal with this.

“I mean who hasn’t fallen for Hal Jordan? We’re all his bitches.”

Kyle makes a choking sound and John simply sighs. Kilowog, is of course, speechless.

“Uh??? Hello?!? Perfect ass, perfect abs, that motherfucking hair. Those gorgeous brown eyes that he covers with a stupid mask, perfect jawline, that smug grin like he knows he owns all of us in the palm of his hand, those _thighs_ that look so good in skin-tight spandex. The way he could punch you into the sun if he wanted to? I could go on about Hal motherfucking Jordan.”

“Could you just tell him all this then?”

“Can’t. And as much a great hero he is he can’t catch a hint from me at all. I’ve considered slapping his ass once or twice but John won’t let me.”

The third Earth Lantern slowly nods from his position to confirm that.

“Everybody loves that guy, even the ones who “hate” him! Batman? Sinestro? Carol?? Everyone loves that smooth-talking bastard, we all just have different ways of showing it.”

Guy points to himself with a thumb. “I have the hots for him, Kyle looks up to him platonically, or romantically, not sure,” He folds his arms over his chest while side glancing the younger Lantern. Kyle awkwardly shifts and looks away. “John’s is friendship, ahem, _best_ friendship. Hell, everyone in the entire corps are his best friends! That includes you, Kilowog. Because everybody _loooooves_ Hal Jordan.”

Kyle was rubbing his face awkwardly like he was trying to hide a blush. He was almost jealous of how openly Guy expressed his admiration for Hal.

“But no one more than you,” John added in.

At this, Guy placed a hand over his heart while bowing in the most dramatic fashion, “No one more than me.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Thought of all the times I put him into a headlock and breathed in his personal space and he’d punch me in the gut. Fun times. Just want to appreciate what I can, y’know?”

“For me, it was always about how he could always make it through anything,” Kyle added quietly.

“Yeah,” Guy agreed, “Asshole never knows when to give up. You tear him down and he’ll get back up again. Take away everything from him and he’ll find a way.”

He put his hands on his hips, proud of himself. No one could figure out exactly how Guy ticked but thinking about Hal was probably a big part of it.

“It’s always been about...How he carries himself. In a way that inspires other people.” And Kyle a took long moment to think before saying that out loud.

Guy’s chest and nostrils puffed up with pride like talking about how great Hal Jordan is was the best thing in the world. He was in his element, and Kyle seemed to be riding the wave too.  


John was smiling to himself, having added his own opinions on the matter in his thoughts. Probably something about how he could always trust Hal in the darkest of times and there was no other person he would prefer to die in battle with. Deep stuff. He held that special smile he had for Hal whenever the latter wasn’t looking. They all probably had their own little quirks around Hal that he’d never notice because he’s a _fucking idiot_. Kyle blushes lightly whenever he’s a yard within his space and Guy, for the life of him, cannot get his eyes (and hands) off of that magnificent body. They were like a mini Hal Jordan fanclub, which is fucking embarrassing to say the least but Guy doesn’t care he deserves to have people who love him after everything he’s done and all that he’s been through. He’s pretty sure Hal loves them back in his own way too, just not the way that he’s hoping for but he can live with it, probably.

“Poozers.” 

Kilogwog leaves them to geek out on their own and pretends the whole encounter never happened. Because there’s no way he could tell Hal in words about the time Guy Gardner waxed lyrical about his ass with Kyle and John more or less in agreement.


End file.
